April 2010
4 posts
Mary Jane
So this morning I had my annual eye doctor appointment. Finally! I can see. I went before work and as I was checking out I overheard the 2 receptionists talking. One was an older woman…hip, but still older (Mary). The other was probably in her 30’s (Jane).
Mary: I overheard on Jay Leno last night that there was an Ash Cloud over Amsterdam…I had no idea that the Ash Cloud had...
“As for me? My first choice is Jill Zarin of the New York housewives. I...”
– Jen Lancaster, on her fictional dinner party guests.
If I wasn't sure I was the favorite, I might be a...
This past weekend Mom had requested that I take a look at the rehearsal dinner invitation list for my brother’s wedding to ensure that no one was listed twice or that no one had been left off. So, I’m going through and the following conversation transpired:
Me: Do you know if Amy got all of the bridesmaids?
Mom: I’m not sure since I only know their first names. Why, do you see...
March 2010
7 posts
I've fallen and I can't get up!, piggy back rides...
Welp, there’s a week of my life I’m never going to get back. Where does time go, people?
Last week I was crawling into bed at 10pm when I received a frantic phone call from my mother. She was in obvious duress and needed me to come over, so I threw on some clothes and made the 7 minute trek over to her house. The outside door was locked so I couldn’t get in, so I called and was...
True Story.
Scene: Yesterday, in the Passat, driving along I-20.
Characters: WAJ (driving), The Teacher of the Year (“TOTY”) (Shotgun), & M-Dub, lovah of the TOTY (Backseat, laying down)
The TOTY realizes that M-Dub has gum in his mouth while he is sleeping. Obvs, she doesn’t want him to choke, so she does what any TOTY would do…pulls the gum out of his mouth for him and throws...
Re: Stephanie, Sam, cupcaking.
cbshelto: http://www.realitytvrave.com/2010/03/biggest-losers-sam-poueu-and-stephanie.html
WAJ: no
noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
cbshelto: why no! i think thats fun!
WAJ: I don't care for sam and koli not sure why but they bother me
cbshelto: i like them more than i liked those other big dudes a few seasons ago
WAJ: the hawaiians that used to dance. why can't I remember their name? I'm going to have to start carrying around a notebook to write things down because this is getting trying
cbshelto: started with an s and an f? sione and fillipe. i know! I'm seriously worrying that something is wrong with my brain these days!
WAJ: I know well I have a brain tumor judging from all the twitching and forgetfulness that I've got going on. Now. I don't know how much I believe in touch except for the fact that they're saying sam's the one that told her...usually if they're lying they'd say from a close friend or whatever
cbshelto: yeah they are def an unexpected couple, would never put them together, but now im totally going to watch for it! haha
WAJ: can we talk for a second about cupcaking?
cbshelto: hahaha sure
WAJ: wth is that? why does society today feel the need to make up words for everything. not just words, but like ridiculous words
cbshelto: hahaha i agree
it was probably some inside joke that started on campus bc of something that happened and it just didnt get explained well
WAJ: why do you say that? because fat people like cupcakes? haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
cbshelto: hahahahhhahaha
heres the story i have in my head
WAJ: did that make you laugh out loud? because I laughed writing it
cbshelto: he says oh im going to go take this cupcake to stephanie
but that was just an excuse to hang out
WAJ: they can't have cupcakes courtney
cbshelto: and then he keeps being like oh this cupcake
and then they realized they are just hanging out
WAJ: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=cupcaking Sorry Charlie...cute story debunked.
February 2010
12 posts
Jury Duty Recap
I got an email requesting that I update my blog. Well, here you go:
On Sunday I had the following conversation with Courtney:
WAJ: In other news I think I threw my back out painting
Courtney: I can barely move from raking.
WAJ: Think that’ll get me out of jury duty?
Courtney: I wish we could be pitiful together!
WAJ: I’m already in bed?
Courtney: Act really religious, that will...
First World Problems
I am well aware each of the following things are certainly nothing in the grand scheme of things, but I tell ya, they’re causing me to come rage-y.
1. My cleaning lady turns off the light switch in my bedroom every time she comes, thereby turning off my alarm clock causing me to reset it.
2. In the same vain, she makes up my bed and folds the sheet down over the coverlet and blanket,...
Totally worth being displaced for a week!
Y’all…it is with extreme happiness that I report that the Great Bathroom Remodel and Hardwood Replacement of 2k10 is complete. Want to see some pics? Hope so!
Here is the before:
I swear to goodness that I recaulked that bad boy 3 times in my 3 short years of living here…and that brown just above the tub has always remained. It grosses me out thinking about it.
Isn’t...
This was fun:
Over the weekend someone told me that you can look up yourself on Urban Dictionary to find out what your name means. Here are my favorites from my name:
1. A fair Irish lass, as heard in the title of every other Irish folk song e.g. “Maggie In The Wood”, “Drowsey Maggie”, “When You And I Were Young, Maggie”, etc.
2. The biggest bitch in the world. Totally...
Lent potentials
Things I contemplated giving up for lent but decided I couldn’t:
*Stalking
*Shopping
*DC Refills (I’d never consider giving up the actual DC itself, just the vast quantity of it)
*Laziness
*Awkwardness
Any guesses as to what I’m actually giving up?
Back to home depot…wearing pants this time.
Anyone have any tips on how to regain control of...
A couple of weeks ago Mom and I were discussing the Great Bathroom Remodel of 2010 and Mom causally mentioned that I should have the tile placed in my bathroom diagonally rather than squared because it looks better. While I can’t remember her exact words, we all know that one simple sentence had a loaded meaning behind it, because obvi this sentence meant “you simply must tile your floor...
Facebook just suggested that I “reconnect” with my Mother. Obvi, they don’t know my “45 calls in 1 day isn’t too many” Mom.
Where's my 20%?
I am about to commence some house projects to fix the damage done by the Great Flood of 2k9 and so in the past few weeks I have done extensive research, asked loads of friends for advice, and met more mexicans than I ever care to at my place for these things called “estimates”. I hope these people understand that estimate to me means exact price I am willing to pay and no...
WatchThis video right here is why I always stand up for Taylor… I mean, she’s adorable and genuine! and if you can’t see what I can see, I suggest you step back.
“You can eat my salmon.”
– Gia, to Vienna on the Bachelor
January 2010
22 posts
Terrific Thursday!
In elementary school there was this one week in the spring where each day had a name. Wonderful Wednesday, Fun Friday…and Terrific Thursday! There is a large pep in my step today and thus today is Terrific Thursday.
1, I look cute:
2, I fully regain my life back after 5 months of working ridiculous hours.
3, My incredible awesome boss gave me tomorrow off…just cause.
4, I got...
What is wrong with my friends?
WAJ: did you watch teen mom last night?
E: no, in fact, ive only seen teen mom once
but i wanted all the 16 and preg
so i know the people
WAJ: omg you didn't watch catelynn and tyler get engaged?
E: no!
they're engaged!
WAJ: I cried
E: i bet
i love them
they are the best
WAJ: it was so touching
E: is it a real ring?
what did he say?
WAJ: yep he had saved $1700
E: omg
WAJ: impressed, aren't you?
E: hell yeah
WAJ: he was just like you know that I love you and I want to be with you for the rest of my life
will you marry me
he didn't get down on one knee though, so that bothered me
but it was awkward bc they were sitting on the same side of the booth
E: when are they getting married?
do you think they'll go to college?
WAJ: I don't know, I presume we'll find out at the reunion special next week
he's going into the army
or some type of service
my guess is they'll get married before that so she can live on base
E: yeah for shiz
maybe they'll ask her to be on army wives?
hahahaha
WAJ: hahahahha what is the matter with you
Misty Water colored memories.
G: i would buy adderall off of the skreet right now
i CANNOT stay on task
but
OMG DOESN'T THIS GIRL LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME (facebook link to random crackhead from highschool)
WAJ: omg totally
creepily
G: and, you can tell from the scars here that she's still totally fucked up (another link clearly showing scars on her arm)
WAJ: hey so remember the girl in 6th grade that had the brain surgery
yes?
anyway
she had brain surgery
blonde hair
and as I recall she had to have 3 brain surgerys (no idea what for)
and she got a present for each surgery
and for one of the surgeries she chose singing lessons
which, to my 6th grade self, was the stupidest thing ever.
G: hahahaha
WAJ: and this is all I can remember about this child, but I'd really like a life update on her
G: maybe she's a famous singer now
WAJ: doubtful
G: hahahahahaha
i wish you remembered her name
I am SO glad that I am no longer my 6th grade self.
Genetics
I’ve been needing some serious downtime after the past couple of weeks, so finally this weekend I had nothing to do but somehow kick this cold/sinus whatever crap, clean up around the house, and go to sunday school/church. All very do-able right? Let’s take a look at what I actually accomplished:
-kick this cold/sinus crap: nope, still sound like a man
-Clean up around the house:...
In the headlines/WAJ's head
Since it’s Friday, and I’m le tired, I thought you guys might enjoy a snapshot of my brain on any given basis. These are some thoughts that actually occurred:
1. Bo Bice Welcomes Third Son - 2nd rate American Idol Loser does not a star make. People, let’s talk about which celebrities to cover and one’s that it’s ok to skip over…mmmmk?
2. Plane for Sale -...
Recent Conversation with my 3 year old neice
E's riding in her new barbie jeep, I'm trailing along afterwards making sure she doesn't run into a parked car.
E: Ok, Bitty (her beloved babydoll), we gotta get you buckled in so we can go to the liquor store and get your Daddy some beer.
WAJ: Excuse me?
E: We're going to go to the liquor store to get Daddy some beer.
WAJ: Why don't we go to the fictitious Target instead?
E: Because we're going to the liquor store.
WAJ: Oh, ok. So, E, just who is Bitty's Daddy?
E: Bob the Builder!
End Scene.
My latest existential crisis
Last night I went to dinner for a friend’s birthday…the BIG 27. WOOOO!
Natch, a cake was involved and as the waitress brought over the cake with the flaming patriotic (?) 27 on top, I thought to myself that I couldn’t believe she was that much older than me. And that thought, right there, commenced my latest existential crisis…she’s not that much older than me as...
Single for a Reason? →
I loved Meg Carson’s post from today…
“The Christian world likes to tell single women that they might have “The Gift”. Basically it’s a way to lower our expectations and get us to embrace our singleness as a gift from God. How kind of Him! Well, I am a re-gifter, so that won’t work.”
listening to Bad Romance by Lady Gaga on @Grooveshark: http://tinysong.com/buis I am obsessed.
“I knew then that this is how God loves us all and receives us all, and that...”
– Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat. Pray. Love.
Things I've learned in 2010
1. If your new years resolution is to drink water, don’t cram it all in before bedtime.
2. Lots of people go to the gym, and will stare at you while you’re attempting to become a runner. Will obvi need to step up my workout wardrobe.
3. Getting to work before 9 is virtually impossible.
4. This whole cooking every night thing? Lame. I’ve eaten the same thing for 5 days...
Happy New Year! In case you had forgotten, you...
Mom: Are you just now on your way to work?
Me: Yep, stuck in traffic now...seems all those people on vacation forgot how to drive while they had 2 weeks off.
Mom: I thought you were going to start getting to work by 8:30?
Me: Seriously? I am so glad I have you around to remind me of things that I have surely forgotten after 4 days. As if I'm not already mad enough for myself for not even being able to make it one day with my new years resolution, thanks for the reminder.
**
Perhaps that celebratory shopping trip was a bit too soon.
Contemplating rewarding myself for doing so good on my resolutions by going shopping. Too soon?
Luke Perry and chick from Rosanne in same SVU episode! I love old tv stars!
New year resolutions: set. http://yfrog.com/auqovzj
2010.
My good friend A suggested that since I was spending new years alone I should probably blog about it. I merely mentioned that it probably wouldn’t be the best reading material since I was a little more than just disappointed that instead of hanging out with friends in Atlanta or joining my BFFL in Charlotte, I would be ringing in the new year alone, with only my trusty remote, my cell phone...
October 2009
1 post
